A while back my friend Zhubin asked a terrific question. He wanted to know if people would rather be the ruler of an ancient empire, with no modern comforts, or live in modern times with little influence and power. I'm not going to ask that question, because, well, I dare not tread where genius has wrung its sweaty gym towel.
But, in a similar mold, I have decided that on occasion I will stoop from Philosofickle's usual high-falutin' discourse, to ask those deep and ponderous hypotheticals which torture the soul of humanity. So, without further adieu, I give you the first Question:
If you could give up your current urinary bathroom patterns in exchange for a once-a-day half hour pee, would you? What if instead it was a weekly 4 hour-long whiz-fest? Keep in mind that this only applies to peeing.
I, for one, would take the half-hour a day. I don't like how frequently I need to interrupt what I'm doing because I need to go to the bathroom. Plus I so rarely get to see all of a movie. Darn small bladder. And besides, if you had a half hour you could just set up and read a book or something. It sounds good to me.
Also, I'd like to thank Mark Danielson for this question. I've manipulated it slightly, but this is more or less his brain child. Needless to say, I'm jealous that his brain has birthed such beautiful babies while mine just sputters aimlessly.
So, there you have it. There's the question. Let's have some answers:
One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
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8 comments:
There have been many days where I have only peed once a day, and it definetly wans't for a half hour. I think there was even one time in like 6th grade where I went to Katie's cabin, I was so afraid of their outhouse I only went once the entire weekend.
Don't drink so much beer and you won't have to pee so much.
First, Gina, drink water. The Army likes to encourage drinking water as a cure-all for everything from psychological distress to sprained knees, but I think in this situation the advice applies. I fear for your imminent death from either dehydration or bladder explosion.
Second, I pee a lot. I like taking breaks.
Third, the post concept: mildly amusing. The song tie-in: freaking hilarious.
And finally, when the Wife saw me commenting:
"Did he write a blog about peeing?...because I can tell you about peeing."
Please do, honey.
I'm actually going to stick with my current urinary habits. I don't mind having to take a few breaks during the work day and the walk across the building to the restroom is just what I need when my brain is getting cramps. I also don't want to have to set aside a full half-hour. I'd rather take 6 5-minute breaks. They're easier to plan around. A half hour is a long time.
FWIW, I drink a LOT of water during any given day, so I may take more breaks than most. I don't know. I also drink a LOT of beer on any given weekend evening ;-) And no, Gina, I won't give up the beer.
FYI, you can read books while at the urinal even if you're only there for thirty to sixty seconds. See, e.g. Philip Schrag.
I would be game for a once-a-week-pee; however, I do have some concerns. What if towards the end of the week (when my pee has a healthly build-up)someone (perhaps my sister) tells a funny joke and I laugh hysterically to the point of peeing a.k.a. the pee point. Would I then wet myself for the next four hours? Image the puddle.
I think a mathematician would call that Point P.
The only reason you drink water is to pee it out. So why bother.
i think more frequent breaks are better. in fact, i have a huge water glass on my desk. generally, i break at least once an hour. first, i empty my bladder, then i fill the glass. in about an hour, the process repeats itself nicely.
i like this because it gets me away from my computer, allowing my eyes to have a break, letting my back and posture realign when i return, and keeps my creativity a bit fresher, i hope.
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