Wednesday, January 11, 2006

After 6 Years

It's official. My unofficial boycott of Dave Matthews and The Dave Matthews Band is officially over.

Six years ago, when I was in my freshman year at St. John's, I started an unofficial boycott of Dave Matthews. The biggest reason for the boycott was that I just heard his music too freakin' much. Every song on every radio station was Dave Matthews. I mean, the only radio station we could tune in at St. John's was KFDM (Krazy For Dave Matthews), but still, you can remember that time too, right? It was like, if there was oxygen, then there was Dave. I couldn't walk to the bathroom without hearing a Dave Matthews song blaring from one of my neighbor's rooms. I can still recall several occasions when I'd just be sitting in my room, minding my own business, when suddenly I'd hear his trademark sound - you know that "whiiiiiiinnnnemumblemumbleeeaaahhhhhh" - over the synthesized drum beat and annoying pingy guitar thing that he did. That's right, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Basically because back then all his stuff sounded the same. Anyways, I heard way too much Dave.

Plus, to add insult to injury, it seemed like every third guy in St. Mary Hall had some sort of strange man-crush on the guy. I bet there were literally 10 rooms - out of about 30 - on my floor that had Dave Matthews posters on the wall. And I think the RA had a Dave Matthews Band bed-spread. Yeah. That was... weird.

In my neighbor's room they had a gigantic poster. I mean, this thing was frickin' huge. I know I'm short and all, but this was bigger-than-life-size huge. The biggest guitar string had to be at least as wide as my forearm. So about half way through the year, when I was already sick of Dave, I was helping my neighbor rearrange his room when the poster fell off the wall and gave me a wicked paper cut.

And at that point I knew I'd had enough. It was time for a boycott. I could deal with too much whiny music and all the strange, unexplainable man-crushes, but once Dave Matthews physically assaulted me, well, I just had to draw the line.

So that's how the boycott started. And here's how it ends. With a Dave Matthews song quote on Philosofickle:

All the little ants are marching
Red and black antenna waving

10 comments:

DM said...

Matthew,
Thanks for letting up on me and my band. These past six years have been difficult for us and I'm sorry to say our quality has dropped off from the emotional anguish we have all felt over your boycott.

I admit that I was also stubborn during this time. The band wanted me to try to patch fences by changing our name to Matthew's Dave Band, but I refused.

Looking forward to going forward.

dyk said...

OK, we know how the boycott started, and how it ended. The crucial missing piece is just why it has ended. Matt Novak doesn't just end a grudge because of a lack of spiteful energy. Where's the rest of the story?

joel. said...

Screw that. Keep the boycott going. My freshman year roommate listen to Dave and only Dave. Coming in to that year, I'd written "everything but country" on my little what-do-you-like-so-we-can-match-you-up-with-someone-you-can-stand card. By, oh, September (I was there early for football, remember), I wished I had written "anything but country and DAVE FREAKING MATTHEWS". Ugh. I still avoid him at all costs. I'm terribly disappointed and depressed that you have given up. Marriage has made you soft, man. SOFT! The old, single, bitter Matt wouldn't give in so easily. I'm ashamed to...to...post on your site anyway. Dammit.

the marvelous patric said...

dave mathews band.....

i am sure history will judge them as some of the greatest monsters ever to plague our planet.

the fact that mathew has ended his boycot shows that he is trying to appeal to a more moderate voter base, rather than us extreme DMB haters. the DMB-H Right has a strong coalition and will crush him.

what would you say? i'll tell you what i say; the fact that matt has shown such weakness and flip-floppery in the face of the DMB now at the time of mid term elections shows him for just what he isn't. If he flip flops on this, what else will he flip flop on? He's married now.... but what about tomorrow? Georgetown law now... tomorrow ballet school? Is that a Juliard brochure i see on his desk under a pile of pinko commie rag newspapers?

Oh, what a sad day this.

dyk said...

The people demand answers.

And I'm proud to add that I don't think I've ever had a DMB mp3 on my computer, and while recognizing exactly the whine described, I would have had difficulty naming the artist.

Matthew B. Novak said...

I resent the implications that this change in my position is the result of any energy deficiency or flip-floppery. Furthermore, ending this boycot is in no way an attempt to pander to some perceived moderate voter base. I question the loyalty of those who would level such charges.

No, there is only one reason for ending this boycot against Dave Matthews: Success! I began this boycott because I took offense to the frequency with which people played Dave Matthews music, as well as the shocking lack of diversity in his repertoire. Today, I am proud to announce, that Dave Matthews' music no longer has the same aggravating and caustic nature that it once embodied. Notice too that I have not stepped whole-heartedly in the opposite direction of embracing Dave Matthews in all things. There is simply no justification for ever classifying yourself as a fan of Dave Matthews. But this does not change the fact that the distinguishing characteristic of his music - the fact that it annoyed the snot out of me - has noticably altered in the past 6 years. Because Dave has been responsive to this boycott, I believe it is time that we remove the boycott. I am a reasonable man, and the reasonable response is to tolerate his music.

I would also like to take this time to reaffirm my commitment to being an unreasonable man. I remain a firm believer in the power of pettiness, and the idea that something is evil because too many people like it rings as true as ever. Let me also assure you that my character and resolve has never been stronger; I am still full of the spiteful energy and righteous indignation that I have always worked to embody. My wellspring of outrage flows stronger today then it ever has, and you can rest confident in the fact that I will always be there to vehemently over-react against those things that I find even mildly annoying!

joel. said...

I would also like to take this time to reaffirm my commitment to being an unreasonable man. I remain a firm believer in the power of pettiness, and the idea that something is evil because too many people like it rings as true as ever. Let me also assure you that my character and resolve has never been stronger; I am still full of the spiteful energy and righteous indignation that I have always worked to embody. My wellspring of outrage flows stronger today then it ever has, and you can rest confident in the fact that I will always be there to vehemently over-react against those things that I find even mildly annoying!

Nice to know you're still with us. That's the Matt I know and can't stand—for no particular reason, of course.

dyk said...

And all is again right with the world.

the marvelous patric said...

if you're not against DMB, you're with DMB!

however, as long you still claim to be unreasonable and your check clears, it's all good.

Ben said...

Say, who is this David Matthews fellow? Does he have a band? Sorry, I've been a bit out of touch for the past 15 years.

Although I'm catching up. Have y'all heard of this hot new music called grunge?